When I launched AmericanIdolSTINKS.com, I seriously considered how far I was willing to go to criticize what I believe to be the most self-absorbed waste of electrons on television. Would I be able to communicate my thoughts without coming across as mean? Would I be able to convince you that some of the people competing in a hugely popular national talent contest didn't deserve to be on the stage? Would I be able to watch the entire season of the show without becoming suicidal?
One thing I never thought I would be doing is defending Simon Cowell. But ...
"I can't believe we're even having this conversation," I said as I explained to someone that Simon Cowell was not reacting to Chris Richardson's expression of support for the people of Virginia Tech and Blacksburg, Virginia, when he rolled his eyes and slapped his hand on the desk.
Cowell appeared on Ryan Seacrest's morning show to explain.
"I was saying to Paula, `What does he mean, he sang nasally on purpose? I didn't understand what he was saying.' So I hadn't even heard what he did. Then my eye rolled, given what I was saying to Paula," Cowell told Seacrest.
The British record exec - who normally blows-off all media criticism of his snarky personality - seemed hurt by the suggestion that he had no compassion for the victims, survivors, families and others affected by the mass murders.
"I did want to clear this one up because, you know, this is a very very sensitive subject. The irony is that we did want to try and set the right tone on the show. And then something like this happens, and it just starts fanning the flames," Cowell said. "And people need to understand, there are families involved. It's not right."
And - as much as I enjoy bashing Simon for his rudeness - I've got something to say to those of you who jumped on Simon for this non-existent episode of sensitivity: You ought to be ashamed.
This is a tactic that is typically reserved for politicians when the facts don't support their position. They misstate the positions of their opponent and then attack the mischaracterization. It's almost as bad as the question in the old lawyer joke: "Do you still beat your wife?"
But, in defense of those who launched on Simon, I will have to say that he has done nothing to discourage the type of misinterpretation of his reaction that happened Tuesday night. Let's face it, the man is rude. And he's rude solely for the entertainment value of being rude to people who are not in a position to defend themselves.
Think about it. When Simon rips the contestants apart, they know they can't defend themselves. Part of getting the support of Idol voters is responding to Simon's verbal attacks, no matter how unwarranted, with grace. If they told him off, which he often completely deserves, they would risk alienating their supporters. They have to "make nice," while Simon is "making mean." It's a pretty good example of that old philosophy of turning the other cheek.
If you'd like to read about the ultimate example of someone who turned the other cheek when it really mattered, click here.